Pics as Promised!

Just a quick post with our City of Ember mural! Kids chose what job they'd like to have on "Assignment Day," and wrote a brief reason as to why. All the red jackets are messengers. I have a lot of active workers!

Lucy who???

    Yes... I am attempting another blog update. I am not nearly as frequent with these as I would like, but it's more of a later priority when so much is going on at school. 

     We are now into the second semester. I teeter between emotions....only half a year left with the kids I love so much, only a few months til summer, and only a few months until testing! 

    I sat down at the monthly grade level meeting this week to review data collected from fall and mid year. The scores were ok, but I still feel so frustrated. I hate seeing any kid fail, especially as deemed by standardized scores. My kids are so much more than a number. Yet that is what everything is truly reduced to... How we decide if they need help, how we decide what type of help we can give, 

how we decide if they need assistance with meals, how effective a teacher is... Numbers. Don't get me wrong, I am a data lover. I strive to see concrete proof of understanding, but sometimes the number is just too broad to be accurate.

     I recently was trying to get help for a struggling student and came to the conclusion that nothing I do will bring the child to grade level in the time I am allotted. I can help make gains, but in reality, it will only help this student "fail better." I have a state mandated curriculum I am bound by contact to teach, but it often conflicts with performing best teacher practices. A student may not understand  a concept from a previous year, but I can only go back and teach once this year's standards are taught, and to fill in the gaps for and or challenge one child is time consuming, for all 40, it pushes me to settle for doing my best and leaves many frustrated. Yes differentiation is necessary, but composing the plan and having the time, resources, and support to make it a reality is often woefully difficult.

     My fitbit measures I walk about 5,000 steps in my school day - between 8:00 and 3:00? I just can't find any time I can squeeze more quality into. Every minute seems to be pushed and I am constantly rescheduling in my mind because I spent five more minutes on a lesson than planned. And I have sometimes stressed my kids by transitioning from one thing to another while he or she is still trying to get materials ready. :( I don't want to do it, and if I see it happen, I try to help with the next transition or slow down. But it just seems to be the culture now. Push, push, push. 

    I have to be recertified this year, which involves collecting evidence of my efforts to better myself professionally. A part of the process is to survey my students, which I accomplished yesterday. I deeply value my students opinions on how they feel I perform. I want to be 100% in everything, but have tried to accept with grace that isn't going to happen because I am a human dealing with humans (who I wouldn't change for a thing)! Surprisingly to me, the area of greatest concern that students share is respecting each other within the classroom. I was pleased that 95% of my kids said I helped them all the time (5% said some of the time), and 91% said I was respectful to the all the time (8% said sometimes). But the majority said that students were disrespectful to each other some of the time. I try to really address this at every opportunity (which is regularly 3-5 times a day), but even after researching I am at a loss as to how to improve this. I sway between "kids are kids...learning socialization is part of this" and "I want the safe, loving, nurturing classroom that is a sanctuary!" All advice appreciated!

     Despite the aggrevations, we still are striving to master all expected of us and do it in an as engaging way as possible. We have fallen in love with the book, The City of Ember, and have tried to do several projects to bring it to life, including a mural. I will try to post a picture of it later. We are working on analyzing and dissecting questions to make sure we understand what is asked and how we can be confident in our answers. Questions posed to these students are so multilayered.... Asking about idioms, authors' point of view, Latin and Greek roots (then give a synonym), and using text evidence to answer the how and what if questions. I work the classes so hard, but there is a feeling of guilt if I don't... I want confident and prepared fifth graders when I am finished. We are also studying the Civil War, so parents will be enjoying the songs, Our Nation Divided and The Civil War Came Marching On, for another week or so! 

     My students remain the focus and source of greatest joy at school! Today we had an awards program and one student in particular who received an award had the best reaction! He ran to the front pumping his arms up and down, yelling, "Yes!" When he got to the front the celebrating continued by hugging others and giving high fives... For that moment, he was a rock star! So I snapped a mental picture to which I will return when I feel overwhelmed and frustrated. I can't forget my first love, my students. I am so thankful for the reminders God gives me to help wash away the things that probably won't matter in a few years, and gives me the desire to create experiences that leave an impact. 

      That's the state of Room 124! Thanks for reading and God Bless America! :)